If you ask anyone what the opposite of love is, they will most likely say “hate”. However, hate is an advanced form of feelings; something you don’t typically feel towards people you don’t know. Adding to that, the fact that we never truly know a person, can we actually say we “hate” someone? I suppose not. Although, we can love people, and a lot of people believe in “love at first sight”. So are they truly opposites?
I think the proper opposite to love would be to judge. There are different forms of judging, after all, and we do it all the time without even taking notice. You can judge someone you’ve never even formally met, just because of the way they talk, walk, or dress. No one likes being judged, because it leads to assumptions and accusations, but is there a way to stop doing it completely?
Recently, I’ve been putting the television onto PBS for background noise that isn’t “trash tv” (i.e. Maury, Jerry Springer, etc.) or news stations. There’s one show that comes on called “Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood”. From the theme song, to the name, to the font, you can tell the show is trying to capture the essence of the late Mister Rodgers’ Neighborhood without needing to see his name in the credits. I can’t watch/listen to the show without thinking about Mister Rodgers and what a great person he was. He was very much an advocate of loving one another just the way they are, and anyone who tuned into his show or even spent time with him personally says that he made you feel beautiful, happy, and just all around great simply by the way he talked to you.
Often times, I catch myself wishing I could be more like Mister Rodgers in that way, even though I know he’s only human as well…and it’s one of those exact times when it occurred to me the answer to stop judging one another. The Bible shows us how with the Pharisees, who thought of themselves so highly that they though of everyone else so lowly (Stay with me here, I know you think I’m pointing out something obvious). The answer isn’t just to humble yourself and see people equally, its to treat people as if they are better than yourself. Isaiah 64:6 says “But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.” (the proper translation would be even more crude as to say our righteous acts are like menstrual rags); by this I mean that even if we have “good intentions” they are not entirely good because of the simple fact that we see them as just that. We are not only equal, but worse, and although we see our acts and how we meant to be or portray ourselves, others do not and will not.
For years I tried seeing people as equal, but never as better than myself, and I believe that’s why it has been so hard for me to stop judging others. I know that this small epiphany won’t change my judging ways completely, and I know even more that I can not do it by myself, but it does help a little by showing me exactly how I should view myself in relation to other people.
Colossians 4:6 